"Once you break the seal, you can't stop."
That's how Billie Lourd explained the vast amounts of crying she and her "American Horror Story: Apocalypse" castmates do on set each day in a recent interview with ET. Billie's character, Mallory, in particular, has more to cry about, though.
"It's exhausting sometimes, because she feels everyone's feelings like they're her own," she continued.
As it turns out, playing Mallory — who teams up with the rest of the coven to fight the Antichrist as he tries to end the world — and the other characters she's played on "AHS" resonated deeply with Billie on both a global and a personal level.
In addition to seeing the connection between the female stars of "Apocolypse" and "Cult" as a "powerful" reflection of the #MeToo movement, Billie said the role became an outlet for her feelings of grief, which were intense in early 2017 after the back-to-back deaths of her mother, Carrie Fisher, and grandmother, Debbie Reynolds, in December 2016.
"When Ryan [Murphy] offered me 'Cult,' it was just a few months after my mom passed, and it honestly helped me process all of my emotions through these characters," Billie recalled.
"Being able to cry for Winter helped me cry for myself. And it's been really healing and cathartic in an amazing way, and getting to be around all the incredible people on set, they've become like a family to me, and I cannot thank Ryan enough. Honestly, it kind of saved my life."
While Carrie died after going to into cardiac arrest due to a number of factors including a combination of drugs as well as sleep apnea and heart disease, Debbie died just a few days later after suffering a stroke. Carrie's son, Todd Fisher, told Variety he believed his mother passed because "she wanted to be with Carrie."
Billie went on to say she'd be thrilled to work with "AHS" creator Ryan Murphy anytime in the future after the experience she had on "AHS."
"I love doing this show. It is so much fun and so challenging and has taught me so much. I would do as many seasons as they would offer me," she gushed.
"I mean, obviously I would like to do, like, a sweet romantic comedy on the side too, but, like, this is my jam. I love this show so much. And I would do anything Ryan asked me to do. I trust him with all of my heart," she continued.