The Morning Shortlist for May 28

By Paige Ferrari

Scarlett Johansson will sing again, this time on an album of duets with Pete Yorn. Love your music, ScarJo, but we think we'll hold out and just watch the video. On mute. (Lainey Gossip)

Uh-oh. Courtney Love reportedly owes American Express more than $350,000. This totally calls for a reality show dedicated to the poor collections agency assigned to her case. (E! Online)

A photographer is suing Chris Brown for assault. Just for the record, the actual scuffle was with Chris' bodyguard. Chris, as he'll have you know, is not a monster. (US)

Taylor Swift says she doesn't "scour awards shows" for new boyfriends. Which explains how she ended up with a Jonas brother. (People)

Chace Crawford is dating a swimsuit model. And no, it's not Ed Westwick, so please stop asking him, OK? (Page Six)

Some people (not us, we swear) think Katie Holmes traumatized daughter Suri by taking her to the "American Idol" finals. Clearly, watching Adam Lambert perform with Queen may be one of the least traumatizing events of Suri's short existence. (Celebitchy)

Selena Gomez has a new reality series called "Under Pressure," which chronicles the making of her first album. We'll start watching it when she gets eight kids and starts living in the Playboy mansion. (People)

Miley Cyrus' underwear model boyfriend, Justin Gaston, has a plea for the Interwebs: "Please don't be mean to me on Twitter. I'm just a guy with a dream." He doesn't quite get how this Internet thing works, does he? (E! Online)

Susan Boyle is dropping "F" bombs left and right these days. YouTube-made celebrities! They are just like you. (US)