Just before Kim Porter unexpectedly passed away last November, she had her children on her mind.
In the May issue of Essence, Diddy opened up about the mother of three of his children, while also dishing on the final words she ever said to him.
"Three days before she passed, she wasn't feeling well. She had the flu, and she sent the kids over to my house so they wouldn't get sick," he said. "One night I was checking on her, and she was like, 'Puffy, take care of my babies.' She actually said that to me before she died."
Kim passed away suddenly from pneumonia. Her death turned Diddy's world "upside down," he said.
After learning of her death, the rapper remembers jumping "into mommy mode," explaining he "sent people in every direction to try to make sure the kids would not hear about it on social media or the news."
Diddy and Kim, despite having split up, spoke often, and the rapper explained that their talks prepared him to be a single father to their kids.
"On some level I knew she was training me for this. I knew that I had to be ready to do whatever I was supposed to do if something like this ever happened," he said. "There was screaming and crying when I heard the news, of course, but I had to ask myself, What would Kim do? I was scared, and I was crying out to God—and to her—and almost immediately Kim's voice kicked in, and I could hear her saying, 'Make sure you take care of my babies.'"
He still senses her guiding him, saying he "can hear her telling me to go and spend some time with the kids and make sure everybody's all right… I'm just a lot more present, and, most important, now my kids come before anything else in my life."
In addition to the three children they shared together –son Christian, 20, and 12-year-old twin daughters D'Lila Star and Jessie James — Diddy helped raise her 27-year-old son Quincy from a previous relationship. All the children are doing well, he said, and they're even teaching him about the grieving process.
"One day I asked them how are they being so strong. They said that, in a weird way, their mother had taught them how to deal with death," he said. "Now, ironically, they are teaching me how to deal with Kim's passing."