The Morning Shortlist for June 4

By Paige Ferrari

After a few too many drinks, classy lady Ashlee Simpson decided to yell at Pete Wentz's ex, Michelle Trachtenberg, "The whole time you were dating Pete, I was [bleep]ing him!"

We trust she was just preparing for her role on the new "Melrose Place." (Page Six)

Christina Ricci has called off her engagement to Owen Benjamin. You may better know Mr. Benjamin as "the guy who makes Christina Ricci look really, freakishly small in pictures." (E! Online)

The Jonas Brothers' mother is speaking out to Good Housekeeping, informing its readership that her boys are men. "They have desires. They have testosterone," she said, adding that they are not, "above or below being seduced." At least she didn't mention their cup sizes, a la Joe Simpson. (People)

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Jonas Brothers photos

Chris Pine has reportedly dumped Audrina Patridge because dating a reality star would "tarnish his image." Doesn't he know she's also a straight-to-DVD bikini actress? (UK Sun)

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Photos: Chris Pine

Smart-guy actor James Franco has totally bailed on being UCLA's graduation speaker. Maybe the school can get (noted commencement disappointment) Matthew Fox to pinch hit? (Gawker)

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James Franco photos

Miley Cyrus is launching a line of clothes for Wal-Mart with BCBG designer Max Azria. The clothes promise to be down-home fancy. Sort of like Miley herself. (Celebuzz)

Melissa Joan Hart was reportedly concerned that Farrah Fawcett would die and bump her weight-loss story off the cover of People magazine. Hey, it's been a long time since "Drive Me Crazy" burned up the box office. (Celebitchy)

Critics in London aren't so keen on Britney Spears' Circus tour, with one writer referring to Brit as merely "a girl walking around, flicking her hair and miming to some average pop songs."

Someone please tell the UK that this is exactly why America loves Britney. (People)

Zac Efron took time for a kiddie photo op while filming a cameo for HBO's "Entourage." We bet his scene involves wandering into the club, slapping Turtle a low five, then inviting the dudes to a sweet pool party at his house in the hills. (Popsugar)

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are still together and not breaking up. Repeat, not breaking up. So settle down, all you Team Aniston vultures. (E! Online)